Thank you to everyone who shared their story for our “An Ode to Black motHERhood” campaign. Below are a few responses that truly embody the beautiful of Black motHERhood.
I think it’s important to celebrate the mother who prioritizes emotional wellness and the mother who utilizes emotional supports. For too long women of color have believed that they have to be strong all alone and that should have never been the standard when you can go so much further with support.
Indira M.
As a single Mama to a 16-year-old girl child, I would say I have always felt a strong sense of community as a Black Mama. One moment I always carry with me is during a period of work that requires me to be away 4 to 5 days a week for eight weeks straight. I would leave town every Wednesday and return to Richmond in time to get my daughter to school the following Monday morning. My sister-in-law, with the assistance of my Mama, held it down for me the entire time. They got my daughter to and from school, to her activities after school. The way they loved up on my babygirl, cared for her, and honored the way in which I "Mothered" continues to fill my soul with so much gratitude with just the thought of it all. Additionally, my sister, best friends, and other women in my village would also jump in and assist. I am forever grateful to each of them for their sisterhood, love & support. Always.
Melody S.
…Often times black mothers / families have to work harder or do not have the luxury of being home and attending events for our kids. Yet, we make it happen. But many times media shows non-black families/ moms as the ones who show up to schools, events, etc. It’s time for a spotlight to shine on the Black moms who attend events, games, go to schools, lunches, etc.
Brooke B.
Black mothers, especially in generations before us have had to be strong. They had to mask their hurt and pain. Had to portray them selves as super human just to make it. I love that black mothers are releasing that stigma. We are seeking therapy, giving ourselves grace and showing our children that we are human.
Deidra J.
Having the village is so important to me as a black mother. Taking off the cape and accepting help from my village of family, friends and other moms was phenomenal. It was so needed. As a black mom, I can do it all but why should I. Asking for help, delegating and using that help to my advantage has been life changing for me as a first time mom. As black women, we often take on many roles which shape up into the best versions of our true selves.
Tiera B
In motherhood, I witness the best parts of me manifested in other humans. I can provide safety, nurture, care, attention, and above all - love. I do these things with the heart of a black mother, but through the lens of a child...raised by a black mother. This lens has equipped me with the ability to understand the sacrifices of my mother and grandmother. I am well aware of the systematic oppression that they fought against to make certain my life was better than theirs. And because I am old enough to understand their journey, I know that their smiles were sometimes envelopes for their tears. Now, as a black mother, I now stand with them willing to fight knowing that the sacrifices are well worth it.
Cherice H.
Becoming a mother is a gift in itself. Being an African American mother is an even more fulfilling experience. Our breath of life into our sons and daughters sets us apart. The curve in our smiles, the tilt of our hips, the curves our babies and adult children cling to when the world gets too challenging. Our deep laughter that comes from our belly or our soft and tender gaze on our babies while we pray for their lives, their success and their journey. Our conversations uplifting our kinky curly hair makes our experience different and our drive and unsaid rule that we have to do it 10 times better than our counterparts of other nationalities. Our boldness sets us apart and of course, the way we love so fiercely yet so gently, sets us apart as black mothers.
Leah B
Black MotHERhood represents the unique experience of Black mothers navigating the challenges and joys of parenthood within the context of systemic racism, social injustice, and historical oppression. It encompasses resilience, strength, love, and the ongoing struggle for equity and justice for themselves and their children.
Cymone H.
My own mother…she is incredibly strong and resilient. Despite facing the trauma of domestic violence, she made the courageous decision to prioritize my safety and well-being by relocating my brother and I years ago, even when others turned her and us away. Her selflessness and determination to create a better life for her children despite the challenges she faced are truly inspiring. Her actions demonstrate immense love and dedication as she fought to break free from victimhood and created a nurturing environment where she could fulfill her aspirations as a mother and human being that did not deserve abuse.
I commend her because the experience of Black motherhood is without a doubt shaped by a complex interplay of historical, cultural, and societal factors. Centuries of systemic oppression, including slavery, segregation, and ongoing racial discrimination, have profoundly influenced the realities faced by Black mothers and directly influenced her. There’s a rich cultural heritage within Black communities that informs the practices, values, and resilience passed down through generations of Black mothers. Given her experience of abuse she had to demonstrate resilience and she has. Overall, the experience of Black motherhood is multifaceted, encompassing both challenges and strengths and my mother exudes that.
Tangee A.
I don’t know any other personal experience that has had such a profound impact on me from childhood to the present time! My mother was a hands-on parent showering my brother and I with love through kindness and fairness, enforcing discipline when necessary, helping us make decisions through critical questions and scenarios, consistently placing us in church and civic activities , showing us by example how to save and spend for short and long term goals, and teaching us cultural facts, spiritual principles, and basic human rights and values. These attitudes and behaviors served as a model for my own existence as a mother. My mother truly embraced and embodied motherhood as a stewardship position given by God. I also captured myself as a mother needing to be a woman of love and faith, tenacity, protector of my children, encourager, teacher disciplinarian, and dream supporter.
Anonymous
Black motherhood means teaching my children how to have respect and honor for those women that came before us. It means teaching my children that the world might always see them as less than but they are the kings and queens even when the world can't see it.
Tiffany W
Black mothers have to love our children with a level of intentionality that no other group has to have. In addition to the fundamental lessons that are universal to motherhood, we have to cultivate a community for our babies that doesn’t simply acknowledge, but celebrates the beauty, the brilliance, and the resilience of our blackness.
We have to couple 2+2=4 with, “You wouldn’t believe how many people want those full lips.”
We have to balance the joy of seeing them learn to drive with teaching them how to handle a traffic stop without projecting our worst fear (that underlying fear we ALL carry) every time they leave the house.
We do all of this while dealing with our own trauma and internalized biases. Bougie Black vs. ghetto Black, light skinned vs. dark skinned…it’s a miracle we haven’t imploded. Black motherhood is a dance familiar only to us, the Tamia dance if you will. We might stumble but damn if we aint gone keep trying to get that thing right!
Lenise R.